And here are 10 more big sports lies

It’s hard not to lump Manti Te’o and Lance Armstrong in the same category of liars, even though they are only connected in the fact that their stories broke at the same time. Te’o needs to be taken out back and paddled for just being a plain idiot (though I don’t know who would do it). We may never know how much he lied to drive his personal stock up, but we do know that he did to some degree. As for Lance, we have a saying in Catfish County that “the truth ain’t in that boy.” He’s incurable. Everyone suspected it for years. He just stated the obvious to Oprah earlier in the week.

Which begs the question: Why Oprah? That’s probably like Manti’s girlfriend. We won’t ever know how that arrangement got made.

In the spirit of wild stories, here are my top 10 Big Lie headlines we may or may not ever see…

10. Nick Saban and the Papa John’s Pizza guy are twins who were separated at birth. You can’t deny they look alike.

9. The Honey Badger was the lead singer of a gospel group before he got into trouble.

8. Les Miles drives an El Camino with Astro Turf in the bed.

7. Brent Musberger and Katherine Webb were wed last Friday night in a small ceremony in Vegas.

6. A.J. McCarron searches twitter to find “Miss Right.”

5. New Tennessee football coach Butch Jones is the grandson of Frank Sutton, who played Sgt. Carter on “Gomer Pyle.”

4. Jon Gruden has announced he will coach any other SEC team besides Tennessee for $58.95 a year.

3. Johnny Manziel was more excited to win the @SECPigskinPicks Slobber Knocker Player of the Year than he was to win the Heisman. (That one may be true, actually.)

2. Brent Musberger wants to learn more about that twitter thingy.

1. Steve Spurrier has belonged to The Hair Club for Men since he was at Georgia Tech.

Til next time, this is Coach Billy Jack Hoover telling you not to be a Slacker, or you’ll have to give me 20.

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