Saving Mr. Midriff

Mr. Midriff beaverdamusa.comWhat Would Chely Do?
Chely Sizemore (@chelysizemore)

“Hey there, Mr. Midriff. You look like a dang fool.”

Well that’s what I wanted to say, at least. But mama taught me to be more polite than that. And speaking of that, where is this poor boy’s Mama? Oh, I shouldn’t say that I don’t guess. She probably did the best she could. Or, she might say, “You should see him without a shirt on whatsoever.”

No thanks, Mr. Midriff’s Mama. We’re getting plenty ‘nuff of a view here.

The cutoff, cutout and cut away sweatshirt from his high school playing days is bad enough, but girls, it’s the visible waistband on his tidy whities just made me want to grab the checkout girl and a couple of bag boys and have an intervention right on the spot.

Here’s my advice or what to do if someone you love goes out in public looking like this.

First off, if you love somebody who would go out in public looking like this, email me at I have some questions.

Second, you’ve just gotta be brutal and tell him he looks like a dang fool. Like I said, that was my first instinct. You don’t always go with your first instinct, but it’s rarely wrong, I’ve found.

Third, get your loved one a fashionable shirt at Maybe an orange one for him and a camo one for you. That way, at least nobody will see you coming.

Okay, y’all, I’ve gotta go. See you soon!


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