Turning 50 Isn’t for Sissies

Loving the Cubs... and other problems I have Mark Grissom beaverdamusa.comThis coming Sunday I will turn 50 years old!

Birthdays have never bothered me. I turned 30… No problem! I turned 40… No Problem! I am turning 50… No Pro–… WAIT!! There is a BIG PROBLEM!!

I am just not ready to be 50 yet!!

Back when I was a kid, I thought folks who were 50 or above were just “OLD”! They were ancient if they were in their 50’s. They were the folks in the “old people’s” Sunday school class at church. They were folks who came to the senior’s supper at church on Friday night. They were folks that brought their lawn chairs to the church picnics and sat in a circle and talked about all of their ailments!

I AM NOT READY TO BE 50 YET!!

I have a very best friend that lives in Chicago. His name is Bill Matyskela. Bill and I have been great friends for well over 30 years now. I am Godfather to his 14-year-old son, Mark Steven Matyskela. This was a conversation that Bill and I had just recently.

Bill: “Mark, do you remember us going to the restaurant with your grandmother and her friend when we were in our 20’s and all they did was talk about their sickness?”

Me: “Yes, Bill, I sure do! We sat there and made fun of them and laughed about all their problems!”

Bill:  “Well, Mark, that is what you and I do now! We get on the phone and talk about how sick we are and all the physical problems we have!”

Me:  “OH NO, Bill, We have become THEM!!”

I have had 5 major surgeries in 50 years. I had my appendix removed when I was a freshman at Lee College in 1982. I had my hemorrhoids removed, (yes…gross…I know!)  I had my 2 feet of my colon cut out due to diverticulitis. I had an abdominal hernia repaired. And last but not least, last fall; I had my gall bladder removed!

Dr. Michael Rumble performed three out of five of those surgeries.

Dr. Rumble is one of the finest surgeons and also one of the finest Christian gentlemen I know. Not many doctors would pray with you before you go into surgery… but Dr. Rumble did!

I had Rheumatic Fever when I was 14 years old. (God healed me of that!)  I have been through 5 major surgeries. One divorce. Lost my mother three years ago, (God Rest Her Soul), and I have constant back pain due to lifting heavy caskets for 30 years! I have diabetes and have to watch very closely my sugar intake. I take a pill for high blood pressure every day. I take a glass of Metamucil each night before I go to bed.

All that… AND I AM JUST NOW TURNING 50!!

So yes… I am scared to death to turn 50. I mean… given all of the above ailments I have at this time in my life, what kind of shape will I be in when I am 60? 70? If I even make it that far!!

I guess it is a very good thing I own a funeral home. Perhaps I will get a discount on my funeral one day.

We had the funeral of a 99-year-old lady a couple weeks ago. Ninety-nine years old! I cannot imagine myself making it to that age. But if I do, Dr. Rumble will need to live just as long so he can perform all the rest of my surgeries!

I just wonder…  What’s next?? LOL!

Take care!

Until next time! GO CUBS!

About Mark Grissom

Mark was born on the north side of Chicago in 1964. Raised a Cubs fan by his dad, he never had a chance in life. He moved to Cleveland, Tennessee, in 1988. While he lives closer to Atlanta now, he will never be able to leave the religion of "Cubbie Nation." Baptized as a Cubs fan at the age of five, he has no choice but to live the remainder of his life here on earth in mediocrity at its best!

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